Wednesday, October 18, 2006
When my Dr. in Kamloops said "I can not see any medical reason why you should not conceive" what he should have been saying was "you have a snowball's chance in hell of conceiving". When he did the laparoscopy two years ago, all he told me was that one of my ovaries was surrounded in blood and that he had cleaned it up. He didn't tell me that it was actually attached to the side of my pelvis BEHIND my uterus (definetly not where it's supposed to be!), because of that I now have a chance of developing cysts on my ovaries, or that I have sever Endometriosis! He knew all this two years ago! My new Dr. at BC womens' hospital showed me the post operative report that my old Dr. wrote and it's all spelled out right there! Dr. Williams (my new Dr) did a pelvic exam and told me she wouldn't have had to do the laparoscopy to tell me that I have Endo. She was able to find all the spots right there! So I've gone through the last 26 months thinking "this might be the month!" when in actuality I may only have a 10% chance of conceiving in the next three years.
Adoption is the only way I'm guaranteed to have a child. We were planning on adopting anyway, but I was also hoping to give John a biological child, too. NOw I have to grieve for my lost hope of ever experiencing pregnancy. All this I should have been told two years ago so I could have grieved two years ago and been able to move on.
If a woman cannot do the one thing her body was made for, what does that make her?
I'm also quiting Tim Horton's today. It's hard going from a job that I love to a job that I hate, plus if I have to stay late at the clinic (which I often do) then I only get a max of 4 hours of sleep before I have to get ready for Timmy's. I promissed John that I'd start looking for another part time job tomorrow. Any part time job that I get would only be temporary as I'm waiting for Dr. Punia to increase my hours at the clinic - I'm told that can be at anytime. John's said that he would never ask me to leave the clinic, but he has also asked me many times to apply for the job that he's got. He's got a full time job that would either leave me with no time for the clinic or no time for him. So now I also have another HUGE choice to make. Do I leave the job that I love and have wanted since I was a child, or do I stay at the clinic and stay in debt longer?
posted by Turnoc's Lady @ 2:04 PM,
,
FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!
Monday, October 16, 2006
Or maybe it should be "WOLF! WOLF! WOLF!" It's just after 5 in the morning and we were allowed back into our building only a few minutes ago. Here's our story: I had a 6am shift at Timmy's this morning so my alarm clock was set for 4:30am. My alarm goes off and I get nice and comfy in the bathroom when the fire alarm goes off. So I get dressed, grab the cats, wait for John to finish getting dressed and head out side (I was very proud about how cool and calm I was. Some of you may remember why). On our way out we come across some guy going around and smashing the alarm bells until they shut off **must talk to land lady about that, because now the alarm on our floor no longer works! I realized that I have a bad sense of humor that early in the morning. While waiting for the fire dept I figured that it was a false alarm because no one had their marshmallows out! Plus I was secretly thinking "BURN BABY BURN!" cuz then I could call in to work! - "Hi, Tim Horton? This is Theressa. I just needed to call and let you know that I'm not going to make it today. Yeah, my home burned down at 430 this morning and it burned my uniform, too." Now I'm just going to call in and tell them I have a migrain instead. That's a lot less exciting, though.
Anakin's sick. We had to take him to the vet yesterday. I won't explain the NASTY, SMELLY reason why, but even the Dr. went "Wow, that's bad!" So he's on antibiotics and a new hypoallergenic/gasto food. It hasn't been a full 24 hours and he's already showing signs of improvement!
Thanksgiving was fantastic. Got to see family and say good luck to my cousin. It still feels bad everytime we have a family gathering and everyone starts talking about their children and I have nothing to contribute. So I sit there playing with my thumbs and hoping for a change of topic. Oh well.
posted by Turnoc's Lady @ 7:24 AM,
,
Monday, October 16, 2006
Or maybe it should be "WOLF! WOLF! WOLF!" It's just after 5 in the morning and we were allowed back into our building only a few minutes ago. Here's our story: I had a 6am shift at Timmy's this morning so my alarm clock was set for 4:30am. My alarm goes off and I get nice and comfy in the bathroom when the fire alarm goes off. So I get dressed, grab the cats, wait for John to finish getting dressed and head out side (I was very proud about how cool and calm I was. Some of you may remember why). On our way out we come across some guy going around and smashing the alarm bells until they shut off **must talk to land lady about that, because now the alarm on our floor no longer works! I realized that I have a bad sense of humor that early in the morning. While waiting for the fire dept I figured that it was a false alarm because no one had their marshmallows out! Plus I was secretly thinking "BURN BABY BURN!" cuz then I could call in to work! - "Hi, Tim Horton? This is Theressa. I just needed to call and let you know that I'm not going to make it today. Yeah, my home burned down at 430 this morning and it burned my uniform, too." Now I'm just going to call in and tell them I have a migrain instead. That's a lot less exciting, though.
Anakin's sick. We had to take him to the vet yesterday. I won't explain the NASTY, SMELLY reason why, but even the Dr. went "Wow, that's bad!" So he's on antibiotics and a new hypoallergenic/gasto food. It hasn't been a full 24 hours and he's already showing signs of improvement!
Thanksgiving was fantastic. Got to see family and say good luck to my cousin. It still feels bad everytime we have a family gathering and everyone starts talking about their children and I have nothing to contribute. So I sit there playing with my thumbs and hoping for a change of topic. Oh well.
posted by Turnoc's Lady @ 7:24 AM,
,